David....
The signs are always there but you haven't been paying attention for a while. Most often it does not happen all of a sudden. We just do not pay attention. Sometime living in a dream world while all the obvious signs are all around you. Wake up my friends. It is not rocket science. Isn't a slow death usually painful? Or has the pain been so chronic that you are used to it. Like a sore that you forget about and never heals.
Why mess up something so temporarily good? You getting plenty of sex, the food is great and the deal breakers aren't that bad!!!
Shanita.....
Its not the slow death that concerns me...its the events that leads to the slow deaths. The harsh words, the lack of consideration, the slights real or imagined and then the moment when you just don't care any more. I remember discussing the end of a relationship with someone I know. At first he addressed the issues that concerned and upset him; when his spouse, ignored then ridiculed his concerns he stopped voicing them. He then began planning his exit. I think at first we try to find resolution, but when ignored we just stop caring...and that is the death of a relationship.
David....
I do agree sometimes the events can dictate how amicable the friendship is after the final breakup. When you get to the planning the exit stage, the damage has probably been already done. I would have loved to stay friends with some of my slow-death ending relationships. But, it never was the case. I think that men, more often than not and more often than women, can handle the friend thang after breakup better than women. Probably because our hearts are not as involved at yours are..... Less skin in the game. It's our nature. Slow death or not.... pay attention, recognize and act on it.
| |