David.....
Been there, done that. My story is that I was trying so hard to please the other person I eventually eroded my self-confidence. Always thought there was something wrong with me and not her. Took me over a year to wake up and hopefully I've learned my lesson enough not to repeat that destructive behavior again. It's almost like losing your identity while incorporating everything the other person selfishly wants you to be. Never saw that coming. But my staff and family saw it all the way. Once again, I was in the storm and I didn't see it worth a poop. Blinded by the light.
Next time... Hopefully there will not be a next time. I'll be able to recognize that cataclysmic behavior as it starts to form around me.
Shanita.....
David, David, David, you are on the money with this one. For me it didn't help to be continually told...this is too hard...you're too this or you're too that. The constant criticism eats away at you and you actually start thinking that maybe it is you. Maybe it's really them. Maybe they just can't handle or control you so that's when the little comments begin. You start accepting it's you because you are holding on for dear life trying to make the relationship work. The harder you you try the only conclusion seems to be you're the problem...I mean you're acquiesced to everything they want, how could it not be you. We'll sometimes it's not...you just can't see it...everybody else can but not you. You are too busy trying to make it work...and when you step back only then can you see it.
So much of this is about the other person. They just can't be honest about what's going on with them and you're just a convenient punching bag.
David.....
Shanita, hopefully we both learned from our experiences and will never let it happen again.....
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